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How to Advocate for Yourself at Work Without Feeling Awkward

by Emily Stapylton-Smith
April 3, 2025
in Personal Development
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Advocating for yourself at work can feel hard when you are a chronic “people pleaser” or don’t want to look too pushy – it can feel awkward. But staying silent isn’t an option – especially if you want a raise, promotion, or leadership position. Here is how to advocate for yourself at work (with real-life examples) to be seen, heard, and understood clearly. Advocating for yourself, like confidence, is a skill – and you can start practicing today. 

A Practical Guide to Self Advocacy

  • What Does it Mean to Advocate for Yourself?
  • How to Advocate for Yourself at Work
    • Track your wins (and don’t keep them secret)
    • Practice saying “I” instead of “we” when it’s your work
    • Use data to back up your value
    • Ask for feedback—and use it to push for opportunities
    • Speak up in meetings (with confidence boosters)
    • Set and communicate boundaries clearly
    • Prepare and rehearse your ask (promotion, raise, project lead)
  • The bottom line? Self-advocacy is a Learnable Skill.

What Does it Mean to Advocate for Yourself?

how to advocate for yourself at work

Advocating for yourself at work means making sure you’re seen, heard, and respected in every room you enter. It’s about visibility, setting boundaries, and creating space for your own growth—even when no one’s handing you the invitation. It is when you raise your hand, speak up, and show up every day. Self advocacy is identifying and vocalising your needs.

When you advocate for yourself, you’re not just asking for more. You’re showing that you belong, that you matter, and that you’re actively shaping or carving out your own career. And that’s something worth practicing every single day. 

What to Read Next? The Best Leadership Books for Women Who Want to Lead Like a CEO

How to Advocate for Yourself at Work

how to advocate for yourself at work 1

Track your wins (and don’t keep them secret)

Start a “wins” folder—digital or physical—where you document results, praise, successful projects, and anything that shows your impact. Don’t wait for annual reviews to showcase it either. 

Try: Write down 3 major wins every month and pinpoint where you can share them naturally (e.g., a Slack channel, a meeting, or a one-on-one with your boss).

Practice saying “I” instead of “we” when it’s your work

Collaboration is great, but don’t disappear into a team when the credit is yours. Women are often socialized to say “we” even when they lead the charge. 

Try this instead: “I led the campaign strategy, and we executed it as a team.”

It’s assertive and inclusive, and it ensures your leadership doesn’t go unnoticed.

Use data to back up your value

Feelings are valid, but numbers talk. When you’re advocating for recognition, a raise, or more responsibility, bring the metrics. Increased revenue? Improved processes? Higher engagement? Show it. You may feel tempted to say I feel I have performed well.

Try this instead: “I have increased traffic to the website by 30%, which has significantly contributed to our annual revenue increase.”

 Data gives you credibility—and makes your case bulletproof.

Ask for feedback—and use it to push for opportunities

Asking for feedback isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a power move. Use it as a tool for development and as fuel for future tasks.

Try: “Based on your feedback last quarter, I focused on improving [skill]. I’d now like to explore leading [project].”
That’s advocating with intention.

Speak up in meetings (with confidence boosters)

Even when your heart races and you feel nervous, remember your ideas deserve space. If speaking up feels tough, try prepping a few points in advance or using confidence phrases like:

Try these phrases:

  • “I’d like to offer a different perspective.”
  • “I want to highlight something that hasn’t been mentioned yet.”

Small shifts = major impact.

Dress for Success: Here Are The Only 10 Items You Need to Create a Capsule Wardrobe for Work in 2025

Set and communicate boundaries clearly

Advocacy also means protecting your time and energy. This is very important for mompreneurs or working moms. That late-night Slack message? The fifth “quick” request before 9 a.m.? It’s okay to say no or not now.

Boundaries aren’t barriers. They’re how you make space for what matters. Try being specific about your boundaries.

Try this instead: “I feel unheard when I’m interrupted, so please allow me to finish my thoughts”. 

Don’t waver. Once you’ve established a boundary, consistently reinforce it. 

Recommended Reading: 17 Gift Ideas for Busy Moms That She’ll Love This Mother’s Day

Prepare and rehearse your ask (promotion, raise, project lead)

Whether you’re requesting a promotion, a raise, or a new opportunity, practice it like a pitch. Be clear on what you want, why you deserve it, and how it benefits the team or company.

Pro tip: Rehearse with a friend or mentor. Saying it out loud makes it real—and doable.

What to Read Next? The 15 Best Careers for Women in 2025 And What Skills You Need

Advocate for Yourself Examples: What It Looks Like in Real Life

advocate for yourself

Theory is great on how to advocate for yourself at work – but sometimes, what we really need are real-world advocate for yourself examples to show how it actually plays out.

Self-advocacy doesn’t have to be loud, dramatic, or confrontational. In fact, some of the most powerful moments are quiet, clear, and completely professional. Here are a few scenarios of women confidently speaking up, setting boundaries, and asking for what they deserve:

Negotiating a Flexible Work Arrangement

Maria had consistently hit her performance targets and had just wrapped up a major client win. With a long commute and caregiving responsibilities at home, she asked her manager for a hybrid schedule.

How she advocated: “I’ve proven that I can deliver strong results remotely. I’d like to formally move to a hybrid schedule—three days in the office, two from home—so I can maintain that level of productivity long-term.”

Pushing Back in a Meeting—Respectfully

During a brainstorming session, Olivia shared an idea that was quickly dismissed. Moments later, someone repeated it and received praise.

How she advocated: “I’m glad that idea is resonating – I actually mentioned it earlier and would love to expand on how we could implement it.”

Requesting a Raise with Performance Evidence

After two years in her role, Amina had taken on more responsibilities and consistently outperformed KPIs—but her salary hadn’t changed.

How she advocated: “In the past 12 months, I’ve grown our social engagement by 40% and launched two successful campaigns. Based on this performance and the additional responsibilities I’ve taken on, I’d like to discuss a raise.”

Asking for a Stretch Assignment

Jade was ready to grow but wasn’t being considered for leadership projects.

How she advocated: “I’d love to take on a leadership role in our next project. I’ve been shadowing senior colleagues and feel ready to step up.”

Setting a Clear Boundary (and Sticking to It)

After being messaged late at night and expected to reply quickly, Priya decided to draw the line.

How she advocated: “For clarity, I’m available during work hours from 9 to 6. I’ll respond to anything urgent first thing in the morning.”

Advocating for Yourself at Work Without Feeling Awkward

advocating for yourself without feeling awkward

Advocating for yourself at work can feel awkward. Even when you know you deserve more visibility, credit, or support. These emotional blocks are real—and they’re also common. You may have thought, “I am not good enough.” Women, especially, are often conditioned to be accommodating, agreeable, and grateful for what they’re given. But you need to reframe your brain. Advocating for yourself is not selfish – it could also inspire other women to do the same. 

Recommended Reading: 25 Affirmations for Female Entrepreneurs That Actually Work

Tips to Practice Self Advocacy Without Burnout or Over-explaining

  • Tackle emotional blocks: Work to overcome the fear of being seen as “too much” or “difficult”
  • Reframe your mindset: Advocating for yourself is advocating for your future. 
  • Keep It Clear and Simple: You don’t need to write a novel to make your case. One sentence can be enough: “I’d like to be considered for the lead on the next project,” or “Based on my recent contributions, I’d like to revisit my compensation.”
  • Find Support: Practice with someone you trust—a mentor, friend, or colleague who gets it. Saying it out loud builds confidence. Plus, they might offer the exact words or validation you need to follow through.
  • Challenge your thinking: Instead of thinking, “I don’t want to rock the boat,” try: “If I don’t speak up, nothing changes,” or “Advocating for myself creates space for other women to do the same.”

You don’t have to shout to be heard. You just have to speak up with intention. Your voice is your power—use it.

What to Read Next? The 15 Most Popular Networking Groups for Women And Which One You Should Join 

The bottom line? Self-advocacy is a Learnable Skill.

self advocacy is a learnable skill

If you have ever wondered how to advocate for yourself at work, we have good news: Self-advocacy is a learnable skill. The more you practice, the more natural it becomes. And every time you speak up, you’re not just advocating for yourself—you’re paving the way for other women to do the same.

When you share your needs, boundaries, or accomplishments, you’re not just getting what you deserve—you’re reinforcing that you belong in the conversation, at the table, and in leadership. And don’t forget to advocate for other women too.

What to Read Next? 20 Inspirational Podcasts for Women That Could Change Your Life in 2025

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